Why I started this blog

Good morning!

I spent a glorious Saturday morning yesterday volunteering at our club's girls tournament as a field marshal yesterday.  If you've ever been a field marshal, you know that your duties mainly consist of just standing at the field wearing an orange or other brightly-colored practice jersey that's too small.  But you're important, because in case someone needs to know where the bathroom is, you can tell them!  Some kids may try to come onto the field at halftime and shoot on the goal, but you must shoo them off!  But other than that, it's pretty non-eventful.  You just spend a few hours on a Saturday or Sunday morning watching soccer, which is almost always a good thing.

The match was a pretty even u13 girls match:  both teams playing good defense but neither able to muster much offense.  As a dad of a left back and a goal keeper, I have come to appreciate matches like this.

Then, shortly before the first half, I heard it.  "REF THAT WAS A HANDBALL!!!  ARE YOU BLIND???  PEARLE VISION IS JUST UP THE STREET!!!!"

I turned around and glared at Lout Dad who had just screamed this.  Big pot belly guy in the stands with sunglasses.

Then, a few minutes later, from the other stands:  "OH COME ON REF!!!  THAT WAS A FOUL!!! SHE PUSHED OFF!!!  CALL IT BOTH WAYS!!!!!"

All this was interspersed with lots of parent coaching as well, by all of the soccer "experts" in the stands.  Wisdom like "KICK IT!!!".  "PLAY HARDER!!!"  And so forth.

You're a soccer parent, right?  You've heard this before, right?  Me too.

And you know what?  I've DONE it before.  All of it.  And worse.  Maybe you have too.

I've seen the warning signs before.  As an assistant coach for a rec team a few years ago, my friend and head coach almost fired me because I told our team and their parents that they didn't want it badly enough, that they didn't try hard enough, after losing 1-2 to the best team in the league.

After my kids moved to club soccer, I got scolded at a tournament by a field marshal (and my wife on the car ride home) for yelling that an opposing player should be carded for a foul.

And sadly, there have been many other things said, yelled, screamed, that I'm too embarassed to put here.

I'm not completely cured yet, but I'm getting there.

But as I listen to the screams, insults, threats (yes, threats), and ignorance of the rules of other soccer parents, I get quieter and quieter.

If you're like me, listen to yourself one time.  Listen to what you just yelled at your kids' match.
Is that really how you want to represent yourself?  Your family?  Your club?  Your kid who's out there on the pitch?

Do other people want to sit near you?  Does your wife or husband move away to disassociate with you?

Does what you're yelling change anything?  Is it positive?

This blog is for you.  And it's for any other club soccer parent who wants to bring a better atmosphere to our kids' sport by being supportive rather than negative.

It won't always be lectures about behavior.  As I said, I'm not completely cured yet,  This blog is part of the cure.

I'll talk about the rules, because about 95% of us don't know the rules of soccer.  Not really.

I'll share anecdotes that you'll hopefully find interesting, and that maybe you can relate to.

We're all part of a great sport, one that benefits our kids in so many ways.  So hopefully, I can help all of us parents survive.

Have a great day!