Wyatt's season began this weekend. Wyatt is our u12 goalkeeper; he splits time with another keeper on our team.
The weather has been chilly and rainy all weekend, and we didn't know if we'd get the games in. They were scheduled for one yesterday and one today.
Usually, Wyatt and the other boy altername games at keeper. This weekend, the boys decided to split halves: one would play keeper one half, the other the next.
Yesterday, Wyatt started in keeper and the first half ended 0-0. The other team got two quick goals at the beginning of the second half, but then we rallied to get one back, then Wyatt came in at center mid.
Someone shot, the other keeper put it back out, then Wyatt volleyed it in for the equalizer! 2-2!
A sloppily played goal by their keeper, and an own goal by one of their backs, and we won 4-2.
Today, we got overwhelmed by one of our club's other u12 teams, and lost 0-6. Wyatt let 3 go by, and the kid he splits time with does too.
So we won one and lost one on two rainy days.
You should have seen him celebrate after he scored that goal on Saturday!! He did the airplane arms and everything!! That's a memory that we'll have for a long time.
See, you have to take away stuff from the good games and the bad games.
I didn't see the game today, but I heard we played well. That the game wasn't as lopsided as the score. My son Beck texted me that Wyatt had a triple save today!
Gotta take the good with the bad. Just like life. Right?
Peace and soccer,
Eric
Sunday, September 27, 2015
Saturday, September 26, 2015
The referees, part 1
Thank you, referees.
Thank you for wanting to come out and officiate our kids' games. By doing so, you help teach them (and us) the right way to play.
In our state, you can get certified to be a soccer referee as young as 14 years old. Most of our league games and tournaments require three officials per game: a head referee that stays on the field the whole game to call fouls and allow substitutions and two assistant referees, one on each half, who run their half of the touch line with a flag to call offside, corner kicks and goal kicks.
The referees get paid per game, not a hefty sum. If a ref works a whole Saturday or Sunday of games (3 or 4), they will make roughly between $40-$100, depending on whether they are head or assistant ref. That's for the day, not per game. They have to pay their own expenses, like gas, food, hotel (if necessary). So they're not making much.
And some of them are 14 years old. In other words, as young or younger than the players that they are officiating.
So when you (or I) scream at them, shout at them, wonder loudly about their eyesight or their integrity, we could be yelling at a 14-year old kid. They could be doing their first game.
Would you want your 14-year old kid to be yelled at like that? I didn't think so.
I have a friend who's 14-year old son is a good soccer player. He decided that he wanted to ref last year, so he got the training, got certified, and became a ref.
This year, he is no longer refereeing. Reason: abuse from the parents.
It's a shame, because he's a nice kid, who is an intelligent player, so I'm sure he's a heads-up ref.
But he doesn't want to hear it anymore. It was so bad one time, his mom went to the supervising officials (the ref's bosses) during a game and told them that if they didn't do something about the parents, that she would pull her kid.
The supervisor said, "You have every right to do that."
She said, "He's one of the refs."
We are competitive people, us soccer parents. Most of our kids are too. But we have no right to scream at the referees. None.
How'd you like someone screaming at you because they think you messed up at your job? Or at home? "What's wrong with you? Are you blind? Can't you see the dust on that shelf?"
They're going to make some mistakes. But they are ALWAYS in better position to make that call than you are.
Wyatt's season starts today. Thanks in advance to the referees who will be officiating.
I hope that we all have a good game.
Peace and soccer,
Eric
Thank you for wanting to come out and officiate our kids' games. By doing so, you help teach them (and us) the right way to play.
In our state, you can get certified to be a soccer referee as young as 14 years old. Most of our league games and tournaments require three officials per game: a head referee that stays on the field the whole game to call fouls and allow substitutions and two assistant referees, one on each half, who run their half of the touch line with a flag to call offside, corner kicks and goal kicks.
The referees get paid per game, not a hefty sum. If a ref works a whole Saturday or Sunday of games (3 or 4), they will make roughly between $40-$100, depending on whether they are head or assistant ref. That's for the day, not per game. They have to pay their own expenses, like gas, food, hotel (if necessary). So they're not making much.
And some of them are 14 years old. In other words, as young or younger than the players that they are officiating.
So when you (or I) scream at them, shout at them, wonder loudly about their eyesight or their integrity, we could be yelling at a 14-year old kid. They could be doing their first game.
Would you want your 14-year old kid to be yelled at like that? I didn't think so.
I have a friend who's 14-year old son is a good soccer player. He decided that he wanted to ref last year, so he got the training, got certified, and became a ref.
This year, he is no longer refereeing. Reason: abuse from the parents.
It's a shame, because he's a nice kid, who is an intelligent player, so I'm sure he's a heads-up ref.
But he doesn't want to hear it anymore. It was so bad one time, his mom went to the supervising officials (the ref's bosses) during a game and told them that if they didn't do something about the parents, that she would pull her kid.
The supervisor said, "You have every right to do that."
She said, "He's one of the refs."
We are competitive people, us soccer parents. Most of our kids are too. But we have no right to scream at the referees. None.
How'd you like someone screaming at you because they think you messed up at your job? Or at home? "What's wrong with you? Are you blind? Can't you see the dust on that shelf?"
They're going to make some mistakes. But they are ALWAYS in better position to make that call than you are.
Wyatt's season starts today. Thanks in advance to the referees who will be officiating.
I hope that we all have a good game.
Peace and soccer,
Eric
Thursday, September 24, 2015
Success and failure
The goal of a soccer game, much like any other contest, is to win the game.
Get one more goal than your opponent. Make sure that they don't score more than you. Right?
Mostly. But club soccer, like other kids' sports, can and should define success differently.
If you're playing a team that gets up on you 5-0 in the first half, the game is pretty much over. But how do you handle yourself in the second half? If you come out and play better defense, and the score winds up 5-1, have you had success? Of course. Your team didn't win, but you played much better in the second half. Any way you could have come out playing that way?
If you're right-footed and have been practicing more with your left, and you make a nice pass with your left, or a nice shot, is that success? You bet.
If you've lost your first two or three games in a tournament, then win the consolation game, is that success? Absolutely yes.
We as parents are very focused on one result: winning games. Please don't get me wrong; I like for my kids' teams to win just like all of you do.
But since we have our kids in club soccer, with paid coaches and nice facilities, shouldn't we look for other things as well? More important things?
Is my child growing and developing as a player?
Are they learning to play soccer the right way, by sharing the ball and helping their team maintain possession?
Do they handle themselves well in defeat and victory?
Are they making the same old mistakes, or are they improving?
Winning is great and fun. Losing is not fun. But often the kids can learn a lot more from mistakes made in losing than in a 10-0 win over a poor team,.
A 0-0 or 1-1 draw is my favorite result in club soccer. Honestly. Even game, both teams played equally well.
A 0-5 or 5-0 result is my least favorite. What did anyone get from this? The winners or the losers?
Player development should be the main focus of any youth soccer club. Period.
If we win, great. If we lose, not great, but why did we lose? What could we have done differently?
Here's to 0-0 draws.
Peace and soccer,
Eric
Get one more goal than your opponent. Make sure that they don't score more than you. Right?
Mostly. But club soccer, like other kids' sports, can and should define success differently.
If you're playing a team that gets up on you 5-0 in the first half, the game is pretty much over. But how do you handle yourself in the second half? If you come out and play better defense, and the score winds up 5-1, have you had success? Of course. Your team didn't win, but you played much better in the second half. Any way you could have come out playing that way?
If you're right-footed and have been practicing more with your left, and you make a nice pass with your left, or a nice shot, is that success? You bet.
If you've lost your first two or three games in a tournament, then win the consolation game, is that success? Absolutely yes.
We as parents are very focused on one result: winning games. Please don't get me wrong; I like for my kids' teams to win just like all of you do.
But since we have our kids in club soccer, with paid coaches and nice facilities, shouldn't we look for other things as well? More important things?
Is my child growing and developing as a player?
Are they learning to play soccer the right way, by sharing the ball and helping their team maintain possession?
Do they handle themselves well in defeat and victory?
Are they making the same old mistakes, or are they improving?
Winning is great and fun. Losing is not fun. But often the kids can learn a lot more from mistakes made in losing than in a 10-0 win over a poor team,.
A 0-0 or 1-1 draw is my favorite result in club soccer. Honestly. Even game, both teams played equally well.
A 0-5 or 5-0 result is my least favorite. What did anyone get from this? The winners or the losers?
Player development should be the main focus of any youth soccer club. Period.
If we win, great. If we lose, not great, but why did we lose? What could we have done differently?
Here's to 0-0 draws.
Peace and soccer,
Eric
Wednesday, September 23, 2015
The Importance of dropping back
Today's soccer lesson is called...the importance of dropping back.
Soccer is played on a large, rectangular area of grass. There is no back court violation, like in basketball, nor is there a disadvantage in not playing the ball forward all the time.
In other words, passing back to your midfielders, back or keeper is perfectly fine, as long as they're ready. In fact, it can be a great strategy to draw the other team forward and have them over pursue the ball, then make a long pass to your forwards up the field because there are less players to defend them.
This is how you play soccer: with the entire team, using the entire field. I like to say pitch, but I don't want to confuse anyone, so we'll stick with the word "field" for now.
And yet it drives some parents CRAZY to see the ball played back. "What are you doing?" "You're supposed to kick it that way!" "You're just helping the othet team!" These are actual things that I've heard rec, school AND club soccer parents yell at their kid who has calmly played the ball back when they got in trouble.
These parents want to CONSTANTLY see the ball played forward. If that happens, the ball will invariably get stolen a lot more by the other team.
These are the same parents (usually) that want to see the keeper punt the ball every time, rather than have them roll it out to a back and build play from the back. Dumb as a continuous strategy.
Your kids that play the ball back have been coached by a coach that knows what they're doing, and they've made the kids confident in their teammates to play the ball back. So be quiet and let them play. They know what they're doing.
Peace and soccer,
Eric
Soccer is played on a large, rectangular area of grass. There is no back court violation, like in basketball, nor is there a disadvantage in not playing the ball forward all the time.
In other words, passing back to your midfielders, back or keeper is perfectly fine, as long as they're ready. In fact, it can be a great strategy to draw the other team forward and have them over pursue the ball, then make a long pass to your forwards up the field because there are less players to defend them.
This is how you play soccer: with the entire team, using the entire field. I like to say pitch, but I don't want to confuse anyone, so we'll stick with the word "field" for now.
And yet it drives some parents CRAZY to see the ball played back. "What are you doing?" "You're supposed to kick it that way!" "You're just helping the othet team!" These are actual things that I've heard rec, school AND club soccer parents yell at their kid who has calmly played the ball back when they got in trouble.
These parents want to CONSTANTLY see the ball played forward. If that happens, the ball will invariably get stolen a lot more by the other team.
These are the same parents (usually) that want to see the keeper punt the ball every time, rather than have them roll it out to a back and build play from the back. Dumb as a continuous strategy.
Your kids that play the ball back have been coached by a coach that knows what they're doing, and they've made the kids confident in their teammates to play the ball back. So be quiet and let them play. They know what they're doing.
Peace and soccer,
Eric
Tuesday, September 22, 2015
Why your kid should/should not play club soccer
Hi everyone!
Hope you've enjoyed the blog so far.
Today's post is: why your kid should/should not play club soccer. This is only my opinion, but I think it's an informed one. I spent about four years coaching rec soccer, and three watching my boys and their teammates play club. Here we go:
Why they should play club soccer:
1.) They are among the best players in their rec league: You did start them in rec league, right? I think that's the best/least expensive way to see if your kid has an aptitude for and enjoys playing soccer. If they hate it, you're out under $100 if they're in rec.
How do you know they're the best in their league? It should be obvious. Not just to you, the proud parent, but are you hearing comments from others? Other coaches? Is your kid dominating the league? My oldest son went to a soccer camp run by our local high school when he was 7, and the high school coach pulled me aside and said, "He's terrific. He's going to be playing for me one of these days." That kind of stuff.
2.) They LOVE to play soccer: This seems obvious, but you'd be surprised how many kids I've seen playing that look like they'd rather be anywhere else. Club teams practice 2-3 times per week, and once the season starts they have league games or tournaments about 3 out of 4 weekends per month.
They'll miss birthday parties, church, all kinds of things for their obligation to their team. Plus, there will be times when you drive them two hours away from home and they'll lose 0-6. They had better darn sure love it.
3.) They have other interests as well: Yes, soccer should be their favorite sport if they're going to play club soccer. But the best young players that I've seen so far also sing, go to science fairs, play in the band, etc. It's a really demanding practice and game schedule: I would guess that my boys play 20-25 games per season, and we play a spring and a fall season. Throw that in with practice 2-3 times a week and you have to have some other thing to do as well or you will lose your mind. Especially after one of those 0-6 losses.
4.) They want to get better: Some kids are perfectly happy playing rec soccer, even if they're the best ones in their league. They don't want to travel all around and miss other activities,. And there is nothing at all wrong with that. I check in with my boys at least once every two months with this question: "Are you still happy playing club soccer?" And I remind them that they're playing for themselves and their enjoyment, not mine. If that ever changes, then we'll stop. Their coaches are paid, professional, licensed coaches that will teach them far more about soccer than I ever could, and in club they are playing against some of the best players in the state their age, and other states too. But THEY want to get better. I'll love them no matter what they want to do.
Why they shouldn't play club soccer:
1.) Status symbol: Take a nice vacation instead. Your kids will probably enjoy it more if this is why you're doing it. Plus, it's not really a status symbol anymore, because there are so many kids playing club soccer now. So this is a bad reason to do anything, really,
2.) Because YOU want them to: At a young age, kids should try playing lots of sports. Just because you want them to play soccer isn''t a good reason for them to play at all. If you want them to try soccer, try playing a little in the back yard first. If they have fun with it, try joining a rec league first. Then if they stand out and really want the commitment of club, then go that way,
3.) Because you think they'll get a college scholarship or turn pro: I'll admit, if your kid is thinking at all about ever playing college or pro soccer, they almost have to play club because the coaching/competition/training is far superior than anything they'll get in rec or school. There may be a few exceptions, but overall it's not even close. That being said, it's definitely NOT a ticket to college or the pros. There are lots of kids playing club soccer these days, so college and pro scouts have their pick of the best of the best. And if any club tries to sell you on that, run away as fast as possible.
Questions? Comments? Please record them here. Or you can email me at edge21117@yahoo.com.
Peace and soccer,
Eric
Hope you've enjoyed the blog so far.
Today's post is: why your kid should/should not play club soccer. This is only my opinion, but I think it's an informed one. I spent about four years coaching rec soccer, and three watching my boys and their teammates play club. Here we go:
Why they should play club soccer:
1.) They are among the best players in their rec league: You did start them in rec league, right? I think that's the best/least expensive way to see if your kid has an aptitude for and enjoys playing soccer. If they hate it, you're out under $100 if they're in rec.
How do you know they're the best in their league? It should be obvious. Not just to you, the proud parent, but are you hearing comments from others? Other coaches? Is your kid dominating the league? My oldest son went to a soccer camp run by our local high school when he was 7, and the high school coach pulled me aside and said, "He's terrific. He's going to be playing for me one of these days." That kind of stuff.
2.) They LOVE to play soccer: This seems obvious, but you'd be surprised how many kids I've seen playing that look like they'd rather be anywhere else. Club teams practice 2-3 times per week, and once the season starts they have league games or tournaments about 3 out of 4 weekends per month.
They'll miss birthday parties, church, all kinds of things for their obligation to their team. Plus, there will be times when you drive them two hours away from home and they'll lose 0-6. They had better darn sure love it.
3.) They have other interests as well: Yes, soccer should be their favorite sport if they're going to play club soccer. But the best young players that I've seen so far also sing, go to science fairs, play in the band, etc. It's a really demanding practice and game schedule: I would guess that my boys play 20-25 games per season, and we play a spring and a fall season. Throw that in with practice 2-3 times a week and you have to have some other thing to do as well or you will lose your mind. Especially after one of those 0-6 losses.
4.) They want to get better: Some kids are perfectly happy playing rec soccer, even if they're the best ones in their league. They don't want to travel all around and miss other activities,. And there is nothing at all wrong with that. I check in with my boys at least once every two months with this question: "Are you still happy playing club soccer?" And I remind them that they're playing for themselves and their enjoyment, not mine. If that ever changes, then we'll stop. Their coaches are paid, professional, licensed coaches that will teach them far more about soccer than I ever could, and in club they are playing against some of the best players in the state their age, and other states too. But THEY want to get better. I'll love them no matter what they want to do.
Why they shouldn't play club soccer:
1.) Status symbol: Take a nice vacation instead. Your kids will probably enjoy it more if this is why you're doing it. Plus, it's not really a status symbol anymore, because there are so many kids playing club soccer now. So this is a bad reason to do anything, really,
2.) Because YOU want them to: At a young age, kids should try playing lots of sports. Just because you want them to play soccer isn''t a good reason for them to play at all. If you want them to try soccer, try playing a little in the back yard first. If they have fun with it, try joining a rec league first. Then if they stand out and really want the commitment of club, then go that way,
3.) Because you think they'll get a college scholarship or turn pro: I'll admit, if your kid is thinking at all about ever playing college or pro soccer, they almost have to play club because the coaching/competition/training is far superior than anything they'll get in rec or school. There may be a few exceptions, but overall it's not even close. That being said, it's definitely NOT a ticket to college or the pros. There are lots of kids playing club soccer these days, so college and pro scouts have their pick of the best of the best. And if any club tries to sell you on that, run away as fast as possible.
Questions? Comments? Please record them here. Or you can email me at edge21117@yahoo.com.
Peace and soccer,
Eric
Monday, September 21, 2015
How soccer happened in our family
Like most dads in their 40's, I didn't play soccer growing up. There was no rec soccer in my hometown in the 1970s and 80s. We had school soccer, but I guess that was a best efforts thing, and the coaches probably taught athletes of other sports how to play. I played baseball for a while, then tennis for a longer while.
When my daughter turned 6, my wife insisted that we sign her up for rec soccer.
"Soccer's boring", I said.
"I played soccer in school, and I want her to play", my wife said.
So we signed her up for 4-6 year old soccer in our local rec program.
Yikes. Ever watch a group of 4-6 year olds play rec soccer? It ain't pretty. It's what we like to call "the bee swarm": One kid gets the ball, breaks away from the pack, and dribbles as far down to the opponent's goal as possible, maybe even scoring. Every kid on the field follows him/her, until they lose the ball. Then they go in the opposite direction, and so forth. No passing, no strategy, nothing.
But she loved it, so she kept playing. She eventually stopped, because she loved dance more, and she had to miss a lot of spring games to go to dance competitions.
My boys are younger, but they both started playing when they were 4. Luckily for all of us, they both were on Coach Corey's team.
Coach Corey is possibly the best adult with kids that I've ever met. And, he also grew up playing soccer. So he successfully brought that knowledge and love of soccer together with his love of kids, and taught them the basics of soccer. This included positions and PASSING!
Coach Corey retained most of his kids until they were 12-13 years old. Our teams weren't always the best teams, but they were the most well-trained and the most fun. Coaches would marvel at our passing, saying, "I wish my kids would do that." Well, they didn't teach them to.
Both of my boys played for Coach Corey, with me as assistant for a few years. Both played all positions, but Beck was mostly a striker/wing and Wyatt played forward, back and keeper. Both showed an aptitude for the game, eventually outgrowing the rec league and moving on to club soccer when Beck was 11 and Wyatt was 9.
This is absolutely true: If we hadn't had Coach Corey and his love for kids and soccer, we never would have kept playing. He taught these three things:
Passion: If you don't have a passion for something, including soccer, then don't do it. My boys and a few others showed a passion for the game that carried over to me. They love it so much that they got good at it, and mover up to the next level.
Technique: Passing, defense, shooting: all taught by our rec coach. You'd be amazed at the volunteer coaches who not only don't teach this, but get mad/frustrated at the teams that do.
Hustle: Not everyone is fast, but everyone can hustle. Play aggressively. Leave it out on the field. All of our players didn't do this, but almost all of them played to the best of their ability.
So that's how soccer happened in our family. My love for the game came the best possible way: by watching my kids. Then, I grew to love the pro and college game. There is no other sport I'd rather watch, any time, ever. But I'd still rather watch them play than anyone else.
Do you love soccer because you love watching your kids play?
Do your kids have passion for soccer?
Have they outgrown their rec league and want to move up to the next level?
If the answer to these three questions isn't "yes" then club soccer may not be for you.
-Eric
When my daughter turned 6, my wife insisted that we sign her up for rec soccer.
"Soccer's boring", I said.
"I played soccer in school, and I want her to play", my wife said.
So we signed her up for 4-6 year old soccer in our local rec program.
Yikes. Ever watch a group of 4-6 year olds play rec soccer? It ain't pretty. It's what we like to call "the bee swarm": One kid gets the ball, breaks away from the pack, and dribbles as far down to the opponent's goal as possible, maybe even scoring. Every kid on the field follows him/her, until they lose the ball. Then they go in the opposite direction, and so forth. No passing, no strategy, nothing.
But she loved it, so she kept playing. She eventually stopped, because she loved dance more, and she had to miss a lot of spring games to go to dance competitions.
My boys are younger, but they both started playing when they were 4. Luckily for all of us, they both were on Coach Corey's team.
Coach Corey is possibly the best adult with kids that I've ever met. And, he also grew up playing soccer. So he successfully brought that knowledge and love of soccer together with his love of kids, and taught them the basics of soccer. This included positions and PASSING!
Coach Corey retained most of his kids until they were 12-13 years old. Our teams weren't always the best teams, but they were the most well-trained and the most fun. Coaches would marvel at our passing, saying, "I wish my kids would do that." Well, they didn't teach them to.
Both of my boys played for Coach Corey, with me as assistant for a few years. Both played all positions, but Beck was mostly a striker/wing and Wyatt played forward, back and keeper. Both showed an aptitude for the game, eventually outgrowing the rec league and moving on to club soccer when Beck was 11 and Wyatt was 9.
This is absolutely true: If we hadn't had Coach Corey and his love for kids and soccer, we never would have kept playing. He taught these three things:
Passion: If you don't have a passion for something, including soccer, then don't do it. My boys and a few others showed a passion for the game that carried over to me. They love it so much that they got good at it, and mover up to the next level.
Technique: Passing, defense, shooting: all taught by our rec coach. You'd be amazed at the volunteer coaches who not only don't teach this, but get mad/frustrated at the teams that do.
Hustle: Not everyone is fast, but everyone can hustle. Play aggressively. Leave it out on the field. All of our players didn't do this, but almost all of them played to the best of their ability.
So that's how soccer happened in our family. My love for the game came the best possible way: by watching my kids. Then, I grew to love the pro and college game. There is no other sport I'd rather watch, any time, ever. But I'd still rather watch them play than anyone else.
Do you love soccer because you love watching your kids play?
Do your kids have passion for soccer?
Have they outgrown their rec league and want to move up to the next level?
If the answer to these three questions isn't "yes" then club soccer may not be for you.
-Eric
Sunday, September 20, 2015
Why I started this blog
Good morning!
I spent a glorious Saturday morning yesterday volunteering at our club's girls tournament as a field marshal yesterday. If you've ever been a field marshal, you know that your duties mainly consist of just standing at the field wearing an orange or other brightly-colored practice jersey that's too small. But you're important, because in case someone needs to know where the bathroom is, you can tell them! Some kids may try to come onto the field at halftime and shoot on the goal, but you must shoo them off! But other than that, it's pretty non-eventful. You just spend a few hours on a Saturday or Sunday morning watching soccer, which is almost always a good thing.
The match was a pretty even u13 girls match: both teams playing good defense but neither able to muster much offense. As a dad of a left back and a goal keeper, I have come to appreciate matches like this.
Then, shortly before the first half, I heard it. "REF THAT WAS A HANDBALL!!! ARE YOU BLIND??? PEARLE VISION IS JUST UP THE STREET!!!!"
I turned around and glared at Lout Dad who had just screamed this. Big pot belly guy in the stands with sunglasses.
Then, a few minutes later, from the other stands: "OH COME ON REF!!! THAT WAS A FOUL!!! SHE PUSHED OFF!!! CALL IT BOTH WAYS!!!!!"
All this was interspersed with lots of parent coaching as well, by all of the soccer "experts" in the stands. Wisdom like "KICK IT!!!". "PLAY HARDER!!!" And so forth.
You're a soccer parent, right? You've heard this before, right? Me too.
And you know what? I've DONE it before. All of it. And worse. Maybe you have too.
I've seen the warning signs before. As an assistant coach for a rec team a few years ago, my friend and head coach almost fired me because I told our team and their parents that they didn't want it badly enough, that they didn't try hard enough, after losing 1-2 to the best team in the league.
After my kids moved to club soccer, I got scolded at a tournament by a field marshal (and my wife on the car ride home) for yelling that an opposing player should be carded for a foul.
And sadly, there have been many other things said, yelled, screamed, that I'm too embarassed to put here.
I'm not completely cured yet, but I'm getting there.
But as I listen to the screams, insults, threats (yes, threats), and ignorance of the rules of other soccer parents, I get quieter and quieter.
If you're like me, listen to yourself one time. Listen to what you just yelled at your kids' match.
Is that really how you want to represent yourself? Your family? Your club? Your kid who's out there on the pitch?
Do other people want to sit near you? Does your wife or husband move away to disassociate with you?
Does what you're yelling change anything? Is it positive?
This blog is for you. And it's for any other club soccer parent who wants to bring a better atmosphere to our kids' sport by being supportive rather than negative.
It won't always be lectures about behavior. As I said, I'm not completely cured yet, This blog is part of the cure.
I'll talk about the rules, because about 95% of us don't know the rules of soccer. Not really.
I'll share anecdotes that you'll hopefully find interesting, and that maybe you can relate to.
We're all part of a great sport, one that benefits our kids in so many ways. So hopefully, I can help all of us parents survive.
Have a great day!
I spent a glorious Saturday morning yesterday volunteering at our club's girls tournament as a field marshal yesterday. If you've ever been a field marshal, you know that your duties mainly consist of just standing at the field wearing an orange or other brightly-colored practice jersey that's too small. But you're important, because in case someone needs to know where the bathroom is, you can tell them! Some kids may try to come onto the field at halftime and shoot on the goal, but you must shoo them off! But other than that, it's pretty non-eventful. You just spend a few hours on a Saturday or Sunday morning watching soccer, which is almost always a good thing.
The match was a pretty even u13 girls match: both teams playing good defense but neither able to muster much offense. As a dad of a left back and a goal keeper, I have come to appreciate matches like this.
Then, shortly before the first half, I heard it. "REF THAT WAS A HANDBALL!!! ARE YOU BLIND??? PEARLE VISION IS JUST UP THE STREET!!!!"
I turned around and glared at Lout Dad who had just screamed this. Big pot belly guy in the stands with sunglasses.
Then, a few minutes later, from the other stands: "OH COME ON REF!!! THAT WAS A FOUL!!! SHE PUSHED OFF!!! CALL IT BOTH WAYS!!!!!"
All this was interspersed with lots of parent coaching as well, by all of the soccer "experts" in the stands. Wisdom like "KICK IT!!!". "PLAY HARDER!!!" And so forth.
You're a soccer parent, right? You've heard this before, right? Me too.
And you know what? I've DONE it before. All of it. And worse. Maybe you have too.
I've seen the warning signs before. As an assistant coach for a rec team a few years ago, my friend and head coach almost fired me because I told our team and their parents that they didn't want it badly enough, that they didn't try hard enough, after losing 1-2 to the best team in the league.
After my kids moved to club soccer, I got scolded at a tournament by a field marshal (and my wife on the car ride home) for yelling that an opposing player should be carded for a foul.
And sadly, there have been many other things said, yelled, screamed, that I'm too embarassed to put here.
I'm not completely cured yet, but I'm getting there.
But as I listen to the screams, insults, threats (yes, threats), and ignorance of the rules of other soccer parents, I get quieter and quieter.
If you're like me, listen to yourself one time. Listen to what you just yelled at your kids' match.
Is that really how you want to represent yourself? Your family? Your club? Your kid who's out there on the pitch?
Do other people want to sit near you? Does your wife or husband move away to disassociate with you?
Does what you're yelling change anything? Is it positive?
This blog is for you. And it's for any other club soccer parent who wants to bring a better atmosphere to our kids' sport by being supportive rather than negative.
It won't always be lectures about behavior. As I said, I'm not completely cured yet, This blog is part of the cure.
I'll talk about the rules, because about 95% of us don't know the rules of soccer. Not really.
I'll share anecdotes that you'll hopefully find interesting, and that maybe you can relate to.
We're all part of a great sport, one that benefits our kids in so many ways. So hopefully, I can help all of us parents survive.
Have a great day!
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